Relaxing is not my forte. I realize my interpretation of relaxation is really more about doing nothing than it is about rejuvenation through some form of stillness. When I try to “rest”, I just end up feeling restless and it prevents me from falling asleep. My mind is presently ill-equipped to turn off, and the days have become a blur of routine. Although it’s taken time for me to build up some good habits during the day, the nights have become strands of boredom tied together with no purpose.
So today begins a new attempt for more intentional efforts in the evening. Beginning the day setting a small goal for each night with hope that by resting less, I will find a solve for my recent restlessness. This post is my buy-in. Perhaps it will be left unread, but its existence is my accountability coach.
There’s a difference between comparison for the sake of rivalry and comparison for the sake of proximity. When it comes to material items, either is a futile pursuit. When it comes to personal growth, it becomes more about awareness of one’s surroundings. The company we keep tells us a great deal about who we are, where we are and where we’ll be.
Conversations can replenish our emotional buckets. But the same conversations and the same stories told ad nauseam point towards stagnation.
I heard a saying the other day, “When it comes to pebbles in a shoe, the only correct number is zero.” Any one relationship can become a pebble in our shoe over time, and although it may not be inherently unhealthy, it can get uncomfortable and bothersome. Too many of these types of relationships and your pebble-filled shoe makes taking another step unbearable.
Sometimes we need to remove our shoes and shake the pebbles out. Other times, that’s not an option because the relationships may be with people we can’t avoid or cut out of our lives (co-workers, family members, etc.). In those instances, we can do our best to remove our metaphorical shoes before entering into their space. Therefore, the discomfort only lasts as long as the interaction, and we walk away with the only correct number of pebbles in our shoes.
Behaviors that serve to protect habits that no longer serve progress, serve only to validate excuses for stagnation.
When chaos becomes the norm and balance feels unattainable, remember – you are not the fulcrum. You are not a failing figure of a blind Atlas, unable to discriminate between the effort and the load. You are the knowing torque, using your reasoned choice to determine where to place yourself in relation to the effort and the load. This cannot be done from beneath the surface. You have to be in the mix. That is how true balance is achieved. It’s not about being underneath, pushing the fulcrum to a perceived midpoint. It’s not about thinking without seeing – it’s about seeing and then choosing where to move to make situations most efficient to lifting what burdens you most with the least amount of mental effort. If you know right action, you know where to stand – atop the beam where the events of our lives transpire.
Knowledge without experience is a book without a spine. Knowing more than you’ve lived, means you only know what others have experienced. This knowledge is useful for sure, but it’s also unoriginal. Experience means something. Would you want someone to perform surgery on you if they were only well-read on human anatomy and the history of surgical practice?
Know that learning is to shake hands with experience and all its beautiful imperfections. Be a learner and the more you will know about truth beauty.
Before we long to live forever, we should first focus on whether or not we’d be pleased to live with our current selves for the rest of time.
Perhaps in the future, epitaphs on tombstones will be replaced by scrolling end credits that play on repeat. If so, who will have played the starring roles in your life? Are you in good company? Are these key players heroes, villains, jesters or extras?
Wanting something owns you far before you own what you desire.
We envy birds so much, our egos have rationalized our decisions to hold them captive in cages. We do the same to our minds. Our minds are naturally unbound, yet our egos need for validation acts as a self-assigned cage.
When we hear the saying, “Abandon Ship!” it brings to mind the imagery of jumping overboard to save ourselves from a sinking ship. What’s important to know is that all the “ships” we experience in our lives never abandons us – we abandon them! Situations, no matter how dire, have no anima. Therefore, do not place blame on any situation that cannot feel what’s being projected onto it. The best chance of survival is our own return to reason. The sooner, the better.